It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
