that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
