you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
