Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
