I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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