He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
