I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
