Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
