Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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