I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Your cock deserves a montage
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
