im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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