I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
