this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
