Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
