suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
