That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Randomize
