Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
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