Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
