She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
We left an ass print on the piano.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize