i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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