Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
