I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
