i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
