The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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