no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
