aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
