The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
