i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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