Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
