She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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