I could have mohawked her pubes.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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