He is an equal opportunity slut.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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