He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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