Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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