I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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