Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
