I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
You are the jesus of drinking
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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