either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
