i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I don't deserve a penis
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
