I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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