I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
