whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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