I'm really into asian looking animals
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Randomize
