absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
