hotel room ftw
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
