And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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