i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
should my penis look like a turkey
this will be a night to untag.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
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