sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I look better un-naked...
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize