He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
