found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
