I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
