It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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