wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
